50 Shades Of Pain

With 50 Shades Of Grey out in cinemas this week (don’t act like you didn’t know!!!) I thought I would share a story about one of my experiences i have had with a dominatrix woman. Mucking around on NZ dating one night feeling like getting up to some mischief i clicked on the sexual meetings tab and saw a picture of an older women who would of been in her late 40s. She was dressed up in all her latex dominatrix gear and her tag line said ‘come and have all your dominatrix fantasies fulled’. This looks like some freaky shit I thought to myself and with alot of contemplating I decided to message her. I got a response almost straight away, we messaged back and fourth for about half an hour and we arranged to met up at her place. Luckily she lived just one road over so I nervously had a couple of beers and a few shots, jumped in the shower and headed over to hers. When I got there she greeted me in her costume which looked pretty cool. After she greeted me she began to act and told me “Get on my bed now!” I wasn’t going to argue, I quickly made my way to her bedroom. It was intense in there, all the walls and the ceiling were painted black. There were candles lit everywhere, on the walls were an abundance of whips and chains. “Drink this” she commanded, after taking a huge shot of this green extremely potent liquid I asked her “what the hell was that?!” with an evil smirk she replied “abthinthe 90 percent alcohol, its to loosen you up boy, now strip! Take all your clothes off”. This was crazy but I was digging it, i started to feel pretty drunk after this and my memory isn’t every good but i’ll try my best to recall what happened.

She made me lay on my stomach which I thought was weird but that hard liquor had gone to my head so not thinking twice I laid on my stomach. She then instructed me put my arms up by my head, she tied them to her headboard. “Let us begin” she whispered in my ear. With that she got what felt like a bloody western cracking whip and proceeded to lacerate my back. Luckily when we were chatting earlier she gave me a safe word if it was too sore so after about ten lashings i yelled it out – “Purple!!”. She stopped for awhile and went outside to have a smoke. After awhile she must have come in because the next thing I knew hot candle wax was being poured onto my lower back into my crack “Purple! Purple! I screamed. I heard her chuckle, “I need another one of those shots please” I asked. She gave me one while I was on my stomach as if it was cough medicine being giving to a kid. I started feeling really drunk at this stage, I recall egging her on to whip me harder. I started falling asleep as time went on. Suddenly I felt something wet being applied to my anus and then suddenly I felt extreme pain!! “arhhhhhh” I screamed and looked back to see she had equiped herself with a strap on dildo and began to thrust away on me. “Purple fucking purple!!!!” I screamed in pain. She pulled it out and I yelled “un tie me un tie me, no more please no more” She was apologising and told me she had told me what she was about to do, and I hadn’t said no, hmmm probably because I had fallen asleep! I told her not to worry and it was just a supprise. I quickly got changed and got out of there. Duck walking out with my back and arse in immense pain. Ususally when you are drunk the alcohol masks the pain but this was so painful. When I woke in the morning a wave of intense pain hit me. I quickly rushed for my stash of codeine I still had from getting a wisdom tooth out. My butt was so sore but what was more sore was my back, I looked on my bed to see a few of the lashes inflicted had weeped blood. My back looked so brutal, for the next couple of days I stayed in bed in pain. Its safe to say she never heard from me again and i’m not sure what type of guy would come back for seconds I mean I didn’t even get to shag her….although she did shag me ;( PURPLE!

Sleeping with My Mums Friend….Almost

As much as I enjoy writing and sharing all about the good times I have had scoring girls and how I have gone about it, I have also had some shameful experiences. This next story happened back before I had tattoos and before I had sneaky ways to pick up girls, like pretending I was a tattooist.

I had just turned eighteen, here in New Zealand when you turn eighteen you can buy alcohol and go clubbing. I was still living with mum and dad in Tauranga so it was extremely hard to bring a girl back to my place and I had never actually tried to at this point.

I was in my final year of college. Half of my friends had already turned eighteen, they were raving how good going to town clubbing was so I was desperate to go. Finally it was my birthday and off to town I went. Back in these days the now closed Grumpy Mole night club used to pump. As I first entered the club it felt like a whole new world. Fake smoke mist had surrounded the dance floor and the loud obnoxious sound of the Black Eyed Peas pounded deep into my ears. I had never seen people dance in the club only in movies, it was so weird. You have all different types of dancer, the boy’s pack which is a bunch of guys dancing in a group searching around with their eyes on the lookout for girls. The next is the girl group, they dance in a group but usually they aren’t on the lookout for guys – they remind me of Zebras oblivious to the male lions stalking them. Then there are the couples, usually dirty dancing and kissing each other. I HATE these ones. Go home and have sex, I don’t wanna see you practically fucking on the dance floor!kissingd

Anyway the dancing freaked me out so I went outside to the smoker’s area. I had already pre-loaded with a box of Double Brown beer before town so I was pretty happy. Suddenly I hear a squeaky voice yell out “Sean!”  It was my mum’s friend Carol. She came staggering over sloshing her glass of wine everywhere. She practically launched at me and gave me the biggest drunken hug ever. I saw my two mates giving me the thumbs up behind her back. “what are you doing here” she said half slurring her words. I explained to her I am eighteen now and this was my first night out. I’m not sure if this turned her on or what but she thought it was awesome that it was my first night in town and proceeded to take me onto the dance floor and dance with me.  A little about Carol – she is my mums friend from tennis. She is this lady in her mid-thirties; she has long luscious black hair and an amazing sporty figure. She is known for loving her wine and being a bit of a party animal.

We continued dancing and she finally bounced on me in this young club, shoving her tongue down my throat. All I could taste was cigarettes and the sourness of the wine she was sculling back. We continued dancing the rest of the night until 3am. I asked her what she wanted to do now. She asked if she could come back to mine, I reminded her mum and dad are home but she insisted she would be quiet so off to get a taxi we went.

We got home and started tip toeing down the hallway to my room. Finally we got into bed and started kissing. I went down on her, she must have completely forgotten about my parents being home because all of a sudden she started moaning so loud. All of a sudden I hear loud footsteps and bang! The door swings open and mum and dad are standing there. Mums eyes go from half asleep to as wide as golf balls. “SEAN!! What the hell do you think you’re doing!?” before I could say anything she recognised who it was there with me. “Carol??!!!!”  Walking over she grabbed Carol by the arm, ripped her out of my bed and began yelling at her. She eventually kicked her out, I quickly texted Carol saying I had ordered her a taxi at the end of the road. “You go to bed now, we will talk in the morning” mum said before shutting my door. In the morning Dad talked to me suggesting it might be a wise idea if I got my own place, mum never brought the Carol situation up again, safe to say they we not friends anymore. I didn’t care about that all I cared about was mum seriously cock blocked me, cheers mum!!!