“Ohhh you’re so tight!!!!!”……… unfortunately this wasn’t me talking nasty to one of the dirty girls at the massage parlour, nope this was the voice of the physiotherapist as she examined the damage I had done to my back. “How did you do this to yourself?” she questioned as she begun poking needles into swollen areas of my back. Without wanting to lie, but at the same time not wanting to be too graphic I answered “in the bedroom” with a smirk on my face. She paused for a minute then she chuckled “go on then, tell me the story and don’t worry I hear all sorts working here”. Well I hope she’s ready for this one…
So lets rewind a couple of days before going to physio. I was up to my old tricks putting in some graft to a chick I met through a friend. This girl was a serial selfie picture sender, sending a shit tonne to me through facebook messenger. Luckily for me I have a whole folder full of selfie pictures I send girls, from the cute innocent smiling ones to the full blown dirty dick pics. This girl though was sending me one every bloody half hour, I started thinking “cool you have lots of clothes doesn’t mean I want a fucking photo of you modelling everything you own”. I would be going for a run and my notifications on my phone would be going mental, “you have been sent a photo’ ughhh. We decided to meet up for a drink on Friday after work, she messaged me about 5.30pm asking if she could have my opinion on something, thinking it was something saucy I replied “sure”. Boom! about 20 selfie photos of different outfits came through, fuck sake!
Well we met up, and she was a lovely chick, I began joking about her ridiculous amount of selfies she sent me, she admitted she was obsessed with taking them. Going out for a drink ended up turning into a fully fledged pub crawl. We ended up back at mine at sometime in the AM and immediately got naked, as we began to have sex she proceeded to talk dirty with running commentary. “Take it, take it, I’m you’re nasty girl” she said in between moans. “Harder! Faster! Harder!” she yelled. I was going back and forth so fast that if I was on survivor I bet my penis could have made a fire. Suddenly I felt my lower back go on me “arhhhhh fuck!!!!” I yelp in pain and crumple into a ball next to the naked girl. I had thrust too hard and fast that I had fucked my back. Luckily for me this girl was really nice and stayed with me because I couldn’t move and the pain was horrendous, thank god I had some codeine in the bathroom.
I finished telling the physio the story and all she could say was “maybe next time let her go on top and do some of the work” Classic.